How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

69

My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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