69

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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JFK

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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Flop dog

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops