Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

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Flop dog

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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British Dentistry

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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