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Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

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God

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What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

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you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

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how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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