Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

knock knock whos there not me

Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

Yidi Huang lives here.

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

How was the fifty-four year old counselor in nineteen places at once? He was blasted by a cannonball.

And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

Mitch

Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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