God

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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alex h is such a ginger, that her hair downstairs is red.

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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