So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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69

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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the battle of waterloo

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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Why didn't Superman save the world trade center? He was in a wheelchair.

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matt shut up

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What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

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What's funny about an anti-joke? It's a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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