- Anti Joke

What's red and on fire? My crotch

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

Why didn't the blond resolved the Cold War? Once the blond's socio-economic background was really poor, she didn't have enough education to solve such geopolitical conflict, envolving imperialism, international influence, militar power and scientifical power, still without armed conflicts, as the respective leaders of both United States of America and United Soviet Socialist Republics knew a armed conflict would cost too much lifes, and even in a totally utilitarian society, the benefits of the war to both countries wouldn't be enough to justify the death of thousands. Therefore, its concluded that a meedle class person wouldn't be enough capable to be the charged to solve this kind of tenssion between States, and it would be really silly if someone happened to encharge the blond in issue.

What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

What's black, white and red all over? A popular novel printed in multiple languages.

whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

How was the fifty-four year old counselor in nineteen places at once? He was blasted by a cannonball.

Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

What's black, white and red all over? Multi- racial genocide.

Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

who broke the little boys window? his abductor/rapist.

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops