If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Why the long face?" The bartender backhands the man making him fall off of his stool.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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Quess what the trash man did today? He took my trash.

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What's black, white and red all over? Multi- racial genocide.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

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Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

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What's red and on fire? My crotch

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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pizzano is a tool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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