Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

thumb_up thumb_down -48

So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

thumb_up thumb_down -78

For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

God

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why didn't the blond resolved the Cold War? Once the blond's socio-economic background was really poor, she didn't have enough education to solve such geopolitical conflict, envolving imperialism, international influence, militar power and scientifical power, still without armed conflicts, as the respective leaders of both United States of America and United Soviet Socialist Republics knew a armed conflict would cost too much lifes, and even in a totally utilitarian society, the benefits of the war to both countries wouldn't be enough to justify the death of thousands. Therefore, its concluded that a meedle class person wouldn't be enough capable to be the charged to solve this kind of tenssion between States, and it would be really silly if someone happened to encharge the blond in issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's black and white and red all over A nun falling down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +14

N

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops