A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

Anything Dane Cook says

A joke were created last night and was so funny! But this is not the case

What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had 3 testicles

What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

Why didn't Superman save the world trade center? He was in a wheelchair.

matt shut up

how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

why did the internet crash? it didn't

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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