What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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Anything Dane Cook says

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How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

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Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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why did the internet crash? it didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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