Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

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Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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Quess what the trash man did today? He took my trash.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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Anything Dane Cook says

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What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

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Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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