How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

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Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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82

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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LIE

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

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What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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