What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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What's funny about an anti-joke? It's a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

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Why didn't Superman save the world trade center? He was in a wheelchair.

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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