Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

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Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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82

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Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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