A dyslexic man walks into a bar, which happens to be holding a support group for dyslexic people tonight. The name of the bar and all patrons are palindromes to avoid confusion.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

A. Four gay men walked into the bar there was one stool left what did they do? B. They flipped the chair upside down By grant c

N

LIE

a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

why did the internet crash? it didn't

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

Whats 9+10? Well it's certainly not 21

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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