whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

KSI

What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

N

Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

LIE

Whats 9+10? Well it's certainly not 21

If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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