What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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69

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? - I dont know man, but you're adopted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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