how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

A. Four gay men walked into the bar there was one stool left what did they do? B. They flipped the chair upside down By grant c

Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

LIE

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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