What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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