Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

What's green and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

A Weight loss service that works

What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

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Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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