Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

KSI

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

what is worse than the holocaust harry' ear acne

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? - I dont know man, but you're adopted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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