Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a scotch on the rocks. Realizing how strange this occurrence was, the bartender immediately calls the local news station and tells them there is a talking horse in his place of business and it would be in their best interest to come do a story on it, because the likelihood of them finding another story of this magnitude is quite slim.

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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So a Nazi walks into a bar full of jews, he ordered a drink and mumbled slures to himself.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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Most of men think: the bigger dick they have, the more pleasure they can give to woman. Most of women don't thinks so, becouse they haven't got a dick.

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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