Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

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A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

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Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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Most of men think: the bigger dick they have, the more pleasure they can give to woman. Most of women don't thinks so, becouse they haven't got a dick.

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I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

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How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

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what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

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ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, which happens to be holding a support group for dyslexic people tonight. The name of the bar and all patrons are palindromes to avoid confusion.

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Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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