How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

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"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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Have you ever heard of Yoda? From 'Attack of the Clones'?

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

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a guy walks into a bar and finds an empty chair near the jukebox. He orders a drink and some peanuts and has a really good time listening to the music and drinking his beer.

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

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Most of men think: the bigger dick they have, the more pleasure they can give to woman. Most of women don't thinks so, becouse they haven't got a dick.

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Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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what do you call a retarded italian Niko

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

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- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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