What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

69

How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had 3 testicles

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

So a Nazi walks into a bar full of jews, he ordered a drink and mumbled slures to himself.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, which happens to be holding a support group for dyslexic people tonight. The name of the bar and all patrons are palindromes to avoid confusion.

Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

What's 6+2? 16

what do you call a retarded italian Niko

Hello penis

A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

Passing by

Have you ever heard of Yoda? From 'Attack of the Clones'?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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