How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

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what do you do if you catch syphilis from a Swedish prostitute? seek the help of a medical professional.

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

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mooooh im a cow

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what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken!!!!!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. He never got an ice cream he is alergic.

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what's famous and sounds like a type of food? a famous artist's name slightly modified to include the name of a food

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what has 9 legs, 4 feet and is orange? nothing.

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a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

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How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

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Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

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"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

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the battle of waterloo

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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alert("The Game");

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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who has no willy? robbie kearns

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops