There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

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a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

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how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

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what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop

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So a Nazi walks into a bar full of jews, he ordered a drink and mumbled slures to himself.

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69

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.....

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What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

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the battle of waterloo

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mooooh im a cow

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

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What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

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who has no willy? robbie kearns

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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