So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +115

ok i'm typing, so how does this work?

thumb_up thumb_down -63

How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

thumb_up thumb_down +128

Every time you make fun of an Ethiopian child he dies a little on the inside.. But that's probably just from the hunger..

thumb_up thumb_down +72

ur gay and this joke sucks

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a black guy and a Cadillac? One is a car and the other is a man. And it is insensitive to speak about race so blatantly, sir.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

there was a blond, a brunette, and a redhead at the edge of a cliff The blond being stupid jumped off the cliff and broke every bone in her body

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

there are three dudes one is white, one is mexican, one is black so a wizard says wish of something you want to be and jump off the roof. so the white guy wishes to be and eagle and jumps off and is an eagle the mexican wishes to be an owl and jumps off an becomes an owl then the black guy wishes he had to shit and jumps off and falls to the ground cause he turns into shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

thumb_up thumb_down -25

alert("The Game");

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

I am Skaldak!

thumb_up thumb_down -90

whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -8

y momma so fat that she's heavy

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -87

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops