Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +88

4/20.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -104

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

thumb_up thumb_down -116

So a bear walks into a bar. Everyone in there goes hysterical with the fright. Two people are killed by it.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

so an american, a Hispanic, and a Indian walk into a bar in Washington D.C, and the bartender says to the american "I'm sorry, but u have to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the group of black men not get paid for all of their manual labor? It was the early 1800's.

thumb_up thumb_down +134

Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Darude - Sandstorm

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What did the man do after he found out his wife died in the Titanic? He cried.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

ok i'm typing, so how does this work?

thumb_up thumb_down -60

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -94

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

thumb_up thumb_down +30

September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

y momma so fat that she's heavy

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

thumb_up thumb_down +49

whats cheese thats not yours? the one in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -109

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops