What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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4/20.

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what has 9 legs, 4 feet and is orange? nothing.

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Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

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What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

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There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

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A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

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Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

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September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

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There's a blonde, Brunette and a Redhead stuck at the top of a cliff. A genie appears and says he will grant them each one wish. The Brunette wishes she could at the bottom of the cliff, The redhead wishes she could be back with her children and the blonde would just love to be back to her family. :/

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? Literally an endless list of things.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

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What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

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how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

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A man walks into an anti Joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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What did the toaster say to the bread? Nothing. Toasters can't talk.

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Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

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Guess what happened when a man took off his jumper?? He became cold!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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