Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had 3 testicles

What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.....

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

Chuck Norris watches TV.

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender.

I used to write letters to Black people, then I got an arrow to the knee.

What do you call a mexican running out of a bank? A man running late to pick up his kids.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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