A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

what do you call a black pilot? a pilot

Your momma so fat she's fat

Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Crunchie

What did Chuck Norris say to the boy? Sure I'll sign your t-shirt!

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

What's the difference between a black guy and a Cadillac? One is a car and the other is a man. And it is insensitive to speak about race so blatantly, sir.

What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

what makes margaritas good. illegal immagrants in the basement.

there was a blond, a brunette, and a redhead at the edge of a cliff The blond being stupid jumped off the cliff and broke every bone in her body

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

What did the toaster say to the bread? Nothing. Toasters can't talk.

a atheist and a christian walk into a bar, they are good friends and enjoy their conversations.

Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

I am Skaldak!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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