Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

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Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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Poop

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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whats the difference between a battery and a charger

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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