Why did the fox cross the road Because it didn't anticipate getting mashed by the passing lorry

why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

i dislike sack in my mouth

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

Halo < COD

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

you know what hurts.... PAIN

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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