A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

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(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Period Blood

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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[Enter Funny-Anti Joke Here] [Enter Retarded Answer Here]

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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