Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

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Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

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Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

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Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

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Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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That didn't hurt.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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