What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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Looks through the peephole.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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B: Laro tayo . G: Anong laro ? B: Taguan . G: Bakit ngayon pa ? B: Because tonight will be the night that i will fall for you . G: Ulet ? B: Over again . G: Wag na ! B: Don't make me change my mind . G: Bukas na lang . B: I won't live to see another day . G: Weh ? Di nga ? B: I swear its true . G: Bakit kasi taguan pa ? B: Because a girl like you is impossible to find . G: Ano ? B: You're impossible to find . ? :)

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Whats9+10 19

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

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Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

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You're mom is so black... that she is most likely of African Descent

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops