Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

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What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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MICHAEL

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I do not like the fact that you are linked with the feds.

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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