Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

What do you call a former pope. Dead!

What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

like for a handjob.

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

don't look behind you

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black...

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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