who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

whats better than 24................. 25

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

Hey, we're both lawyers.

Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

im a selling a car

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

SC Johnson a Family Company

Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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