What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

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Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

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What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

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What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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Do you need any assistance?

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call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

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Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

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What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops