A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

WILSON!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A: Knock knock. B: <>

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

thumb_up thumb_down +43

why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops