Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

A 36 year old Canadian woman.

Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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