How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

don't look behind you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops