What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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don't look behind you

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Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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