How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

Chicken

I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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