Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

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A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

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Hi Shelby!!

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a sword? A dead black man

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"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

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Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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