Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

How did Danny break his bike? No one really knows. The best probable guess who be a tree fell on it, because Danny and his bike were found under a fallen tree.

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

Black Veil Brides.

what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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