Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Black Veil Brides.

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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Japan called... They need help.

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Cows go moo.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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What's dead? Your mum.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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