a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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The horse said "nay."

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why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

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Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Women

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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Knock Knock Come in

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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Canida

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how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

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Once upon a time there was a girl who was going out with a boy 2 years older tan her. He was 16 and she was 14. Does it make him a pedo? cause everyone says he is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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