I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

Japan called... They need help.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

stop it ryan vallee

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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