A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

A jew go out of a bar

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

Hi Shelby!!

a catholic priest and a young boy

A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

Why did the asian die? he was driving

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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