Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

Black Veil Brides.

96

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

There's no "i" in tim.

A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

Why did the child step on a ball?

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Why was Timmy sad?

That didn't hurt.

What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

I have no ideas.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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