A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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I have no ideas.

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stop it ryan vallee

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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