Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

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The horse said "nay."

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why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Women

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

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Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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What's a boomerang that never comes back to you? A stick. :/

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Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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