a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

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A man walks into a bar. The other two ducked, and then immediately called an ambulance.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

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Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

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What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

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Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

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Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

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A man walks into an anti Joke.

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

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There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

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Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

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Q: Why was Sally sad? A: Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally.

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

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Who're you gonna' call when you're apartments being ravaged by ghosts? Your doctor, for you might have schizophrenia.

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Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

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Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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