What did the cabbage say to the cabbage? I dont know ask the leafy guy.... >_

German sausage is the wurst

only in america: does pizza arrive at your house faster than an ambulence do banks leave their doors open and chain their pens to the desks people put their usless junk in the garage and thier expensive cars in the driveway

a atheist and a christian walk into a bar, they are good friends and enjoy their conversations.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock Knock, Who's There The Chicken

There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

Why does god never feel anger? Because you need to exist to have feelings.

whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

Whats better than finding a hot girl in your room? nothing

The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

What is worse than the Holocost? Keeping the Jews alive.

A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Q: What does a blond do with a box of crayons? A: Paints a picture

Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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