If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

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Chayton

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

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Three hispanic men pull up to a suburban residence. They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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