A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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