What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Its socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

thumb_up thumb_down +27

minced oaths

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black man who graduated med school? A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

thumb_up thumb_down +25

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops