Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

Once upon a time there was a girl who was going out with a boy 2 years older tan her. He was 16 and she was 14. Does it make him a pedo? cause everyone says he is.

Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

i love antijokes

I don't like movies. Because ticket prices are overwhelming.

My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

Knock knock Who's there? Osama Bin Laden

How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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