A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

Jake Bowar

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

Knock Knock It's Open!

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

Barack Obama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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