What has 5 legs, 4 eyes, and 8 stomachs? Nothing.

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I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

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Knock knock. Who's there? James. James who? You know, from across the road? But where's the punchline? This isn't a joke. Isn't it? No. Can you still add a punchline? OPEN THE DOOR!

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flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

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Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Why do black men run faster then white men? Because they practice more and some simply want to improve themselves in the sport more then other men. Of course, some white men are faster then some black men, so the whole question in general is not true. You should not believe everything you read on here.

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Gestapo.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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