Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats really hot the sun

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

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What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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Chayton

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anne hatthaway

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What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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