Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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What has two heads and one body Conjoined twins

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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who smells? •Liam

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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[Enter Funny-Anti Joke Here] [Enter Retarded Answer Here]

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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What is next?

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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