Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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i love antijokes

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

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I don't like movies. Because ticket prices are overwhelming.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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