What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Hey I just met you,and this is crazy,please stand up,if you're the real slim shady.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Knock knock (No one is home)

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

thumb_up thumb_down +43

There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops