Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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YOU IS DUM

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

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Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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