how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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jeremie er en ape hvorfor er han det? Who cares!

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what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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anne hatthaway

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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poop

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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Will gropes Ebola victims

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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