Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

Homework.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding an apple in your worm.

How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

A man with AIDS walks into a bar, what does he say? I have AIDS

The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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