Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Hello

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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What's fast and white ? A chicken after you hit it going 100mph

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a wet towel? The towel doesn't kick when you hang it

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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what do snozberries taste like? Lama

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Whos breath stinks and mas in jail. Bomber Neville

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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