A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

Yo Momma's So Fat... She tried Weight Watchers, and still gained weight... She hung herself last weekend.

why is your hair black? it was heretitery.

a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

monkey sponge

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because skeletons are no longer sentient beings and cannot move.

-What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. _________________________________________________________________ -What's the difference between 1,000 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't use a pitch fork to move my Lamborghini.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your TV

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

Your mom

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs? A: Russell

What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

Whats something thats red and swings A baby on a meat hook

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

Why did the pig fly cuz his wife is a bitch

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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