Period Blood

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An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

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Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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What's black and full of coke? a bottle of coca-cola

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What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

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What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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