Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

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whats worse then a paper cut, the holocaust, whats worse then the holocaust, two paper cuts

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas? A pair of protesthic arms which changed his life forever

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop? It very depending on the amount of saliva produced in ones mouth..

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- Server, there's a hair in my soup ! - You're right, sir, I'll give you another soup imminently.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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What's worse than death? Not a lot!

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Q:How many Jews can you fit in a car? A:Two in the front, two in the back, and however many will fit in the ashtray.

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What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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