Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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