Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because skeletons are no longer sentient beings and cannot move.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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Sandusky went from Penn State, to the State Penn.

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Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

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What is the biggest, most elaborate lie? Santa Clause

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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Roses are black biolets are black I colorblind

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How many people with ADD does it take to...Oh look! Shiny!!!

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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Your mom

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YOU IS DUM

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I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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Boob Top view B Front view oo Side view b

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops