Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

BWAT

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

why did Max cry??? chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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