- Anti Joke

A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

What do you do when you see a one legged black man? Stop laughing and reload.

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's black and full of coke? a bottle of coca-cola

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......