How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

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YOLO

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Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

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Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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blind man walks into a . . . .. .

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops