Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

Unflushed Shit...

What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

Penis!

I cant think of one (._. )

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

Gestapo.

A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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