How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

women

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

Kah-________-

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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