My friends are like trampolines I have none

thumb_up thumb_down +14

SC Johnson a Family Company

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Frown is a four letter word.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Kah-________-

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

thumb_up thumb_down +10

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey, we're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops