Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

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Whats another word for Thesaurus?

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What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

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Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

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Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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robin, get in the car.

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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whats the difference between a battery and a charger

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops