Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

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What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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