There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

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Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

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Wolf Pussy

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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