why did the 8 year old want a squirt gun? his parents were on fire

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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hi

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Black Veil Brides.

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what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Paul Dylan King!

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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