Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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-Knock Knock. -Come in.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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What sucks?

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops