YOU IS DUM

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Whats something thats red and swings A baby on a meat hook

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I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

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When I went on this website for the first time with a few friends, I was surprised to see a lot of these jokes were actually capable of making me laugh. But as I read on, eventually those funny, harmless jokes turned into offensive, ignorant, and very absurd statements. I realize that this 'anti joke' website was most likely created by a bunch of white people, because obviously white people are one of the most racest human beings, but all this is just too much! I guess I'm trying to say: if your going to make a joke, be respectful about it. America has gone through a lot of unforgiveable hardships and unfortunately these 'jokes' are making fun of all of that in a very offensive way.

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Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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