Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops