Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

An blind orphan in an impoverished Irish village develops both AIDS and terminal cancer. You laughed a little at that. You are going to hell.

Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

Lil' Wayne

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

HARRY EFFING STYLES

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

knock knock whos there? how should I know?

Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...