Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

Turn around.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

To mamas so fat shes fat

The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...