Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you do when you see a one legged black man? Stop laughing and reload.

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A man with AIDS walks into a bar, what does he say? I have AIDS

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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What does the scarecrow from the wizard of oz and a zombie have in common? They both want brains.

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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i love antijokes

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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I don't like movies. Because ticket prices are overwhelming.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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