What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

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why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

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Anti jokes.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

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Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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Homework.

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A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

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S.O.P.A

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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