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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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