Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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you were my brotha, from another motha, you touch my girl, ill leave you dead in the gutta.

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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"knock knock" "who's there?" "its your girlfriend, lets have sex"

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops