minced oaths

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

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World Peace

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How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

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A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

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your mom is so lesbian that in prder to have you she planted a seed in her vagina because she refused to have sex with a man

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Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

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What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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Left. That one direction...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

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what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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