Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

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69

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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Whats9+10 19

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Knock knock *runs away laughing*

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Amputations.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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