How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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what do you call a black man named mike

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Your mom

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Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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How do you get a bear out of a tree with cheese? Camembert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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