What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw an eatable life form.

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

Is this a chair?

whats pale and white your ass.

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

is mayonnaise an instrument?

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

What's black and full of coke? a bottle of coca-cola

What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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