Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

Womens rights

what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

Knock, Knock. Come in.

Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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