Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

A baseball player hits a home run and wins the game for his team, when he arrives back home expecting to see his mother and father, he remembers they both died in a car crash several years ago.

Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

A man walks into a park and presents candy to children. They request more candy and thus are laureded into his van. They are raped murdered and never seen again.

How do you stop a black person from drowning? You don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...