why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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I'm taken

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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Women's rights.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

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GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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