If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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Kah-________-

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Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

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Susie has Autism

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

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planking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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