Microsoft Windows

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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25

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what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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Looks through the peephole.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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Penis!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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