What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

Knock, knock. Come in!

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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