What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

planking.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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