Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

The Economy

Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

a man walked out of church and said F***!

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

A llama walks into a pub. Actually, he didnt, because it is physically impossible for a llama to stand up and proceed to walk over 2.8 feet. That stat was a lie.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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