how do you kill jesus? with a knife

What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

69

What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

A fat boy walked into a party

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

A seal walks into a club.

Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

Knock, knock. Come in.......

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

Tennesse

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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