Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

69

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is a question?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Amputations.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock, Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops