Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the blond die? Substance abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I cant think of one (._. )

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops