what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

Why did the bunny eat his food

How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

HARRY EFFING STYLES

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

Yo mama so ugly... She never got married because most men found it hard to marry her because of her looks

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

BWAT

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

h

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...