Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

Q: Whats so funny about an antijoke? A: nothing

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

potato farming

Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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