An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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