Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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Will you marry me?

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How much is an abortion? A life

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Why didn't Peter get anything from his parents for Christmas? His parents have been dead for 5 years

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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Jesus Christ walks into a Hotel.. he hands the Inn keeper 3 nails and says " Hey..can you put me UP for the night?"

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

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What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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