What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

Hitler was Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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