An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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whats the difference between a Jew and Santa Santa's magical.

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Penis.

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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