Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

women's lacrosse.

what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

suck my dick.

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

69

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

cms.......?????

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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