While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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Why was the Black man Running? Because he was trying to get in shape for the Olympics.

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skjer;nf;oashfaefaohesf oiqeshLACLAHN IS SUTRP SD] make it shorett and swert

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

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Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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