That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

Knock, knock. Come in!

What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

What do you do when you see a one legged black man? Stop laughing and reload.

Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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