A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down +38

i hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops