This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

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What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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