What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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What is brown and sticky?

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Looks through the peephole.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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World Peace

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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