Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

HARRY EFFING STYLES

thumb_up thumb_down +46

why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +34

so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

thumb_up thumb_down +34

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is a question?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops