How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

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h

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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Microsoft Windows

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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women's lacrosse.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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