How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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Baseball

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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42.

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops