A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Yo mama so ugly... She never got married because most men found it hard to marry her because of her looks

thumb_up thumb_down +43

BWAT

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

thumb_up thumb_down +35

h

thumb_up thumb_down +35

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +35

You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops