Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

you will die someday

thumb_up thumb_down -3

When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who lives with josh moran? A gay asian

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

john liked the paper........ so he took it

thumb_up thumb_down -5

TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

OGC - tilt your head

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red violet are blu--- blue? violets are violet! weird, isn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than losing your job? Getting thrown into the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops