Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops