What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

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Chuck Norris died.

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what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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