Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

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OBAMA

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

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the guy below me is gay

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Wolf Pussy

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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