what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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roses are red, violets are violet

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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Baseball

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Roses are red, Violets are not blue, they're violet, which is why they're called violets.

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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42.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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