A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You thought that this would be romantic, but alas, it is only gardening facts

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

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Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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