2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

How do u shit With ur ass

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

42.

Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

whats pale and white your ass.

Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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