What did the black man do when i shit in he's pant? Changed pants.

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You smell bad? Cool.

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A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

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Stephen Hawking can walk

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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What time did the tennis start? Tennish

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

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I'm taken

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

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Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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Women's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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