A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

What is samios' favorite position? ;) Full back... In the bum.

Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

ive got 99 problems and my diabetes is one of them

Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

cory is gay

Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...