Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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A fat boy walked into a party

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Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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What happened when the girl did the splits? She lacerated her vagina.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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