What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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42.

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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