why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

A woman gets in her car to drive.

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

Chuck Norris died.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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