What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

Knock Knock No one answers....

what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

A man and a chicken walk into a bar... I forgot the rest of the joke .... YOUR MUMS A WHORE

What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...