How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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