- Anti Joke

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

women's rights

A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

http://www.ladsta.com

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

Homework.

stuff and dogs {()}

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??