"Hello." "Hi."

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

What's white and very boney? A bone

Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

Womens' rights.

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

69

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

Paul Dylan King!

What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...