killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

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I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga A: You pokerface

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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antijokes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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k

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What happened to the man that jumped off the cliff. He died....

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yo momma is so tall shes tall

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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Whats 0+0 0

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Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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