A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

How many girls does it take to sell out a Justin Beiber concert? None, all of them are boys.

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

Q: Whats so funny about an antijoke? A: nothing

- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...