So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

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Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

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We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

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Did you know?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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