Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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planking.

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- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

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What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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dog

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4023145287

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Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

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Yo moma is so fat. yep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

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Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

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Obama-Care

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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