Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

Knock Knock No one answers....

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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