An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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Wolf Pussy

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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