My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all starts back in 1765. Sir clucks the 3rd, was the finest most brave chicken there was. No other chickens could even compare. Well you see Sir clucks, with all of his riches and wealth, was one of the most popular chickens of his time. Everyone knew of his vast fortunes. Unfortunately for sir clucks his fortune caused him great misfortunes. You see the dastardly Honey badger brothers heard of the Great Sir clucks and thought to themselves "Why does sir clucks get all the fame and fortune." With that being said the Three brothers came up with one of the most evil plans. They found sir clucks, walking through an alleyway in SHITBUTT city. They surrounded Sir clucks and beat him to the brink of death. They then threw a bag over his head and threw him in their windowless rape van. They then sped off in the night, taking sir clucks to their hideout out in the Dastardly Dry Desert. Not many days passed before the citizens of SHITBUTT city realized that their Most beloved Sir clucks had gone missing. Day,weeks months passed by, but to no avail. Finally, in the 4th month of sir clucks absence, the honey badger brothers sent mayor Monkeyman a ransom note explaining how they want 1 million in clean bills. Little did they know Sir clucks had been coming up with a plan of his own, as the days passed. Nightfall came and Sir clucks set his plan in motion. He had been working on getting his bindings loose and tonight was the night he would escape. "I don't feel so well" says sir clucks to one of the honey badger brothers that was on guard that night. "ehhh what seems to be the problem?" he opens sirclucks cage, not knowing he is a 7th level Black belt. BAM SMACK BONG and with that sir clucks moved quicker than a jack rabbit and ran out into the chill desert night. After hours of running and his feet bloody to the bone he came to a road. You know what happened next? He crossed that SHIT and lived happily ever after And that my amigos is the Factual true story of Sir clucks the 3rd.

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how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

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what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

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women's rights

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potato farming

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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