Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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I use to be an adventurer like you! Then I got bored.

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Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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There are four types of people in this world. I never said I would name them all

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weiner? balls

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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So i walk in my house after drinking that night.... my wall is green

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

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The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

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Your momma's so fat she has fat rolls on her stomach.

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whats sad about a jew in a gas tank? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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