Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

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What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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