roses are red, violets are violet

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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whats the difference between a Jew and Santa Santa's magical.

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Penis.

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

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What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops