what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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Haha

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

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What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

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A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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penis

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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Chuck Norris can drive a car using just his hands and feet!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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