What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

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In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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