What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What iz stupid? Hibiyav

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A Jew walks into a gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

cory is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hey

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My Girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

666

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops