Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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2

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how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

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Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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4023145287

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

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That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

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What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

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What was the color blind boy's favorite color? I don't know? neither did he

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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